A Survival Guide for Christians Who Have Been Fighting Against Marriage Equality

survival guide evol

Many of us have been in the Marriage Equality war for a long, long time.

I remember a drag queen host taking the microphone at San Jose Pride about a dozen years ago. She saw a group with “Freedom to Marry” t-shirts, and with a twinge of sadness remarked, “Oh honeys, they are NEVER going to let us get married, ever. You may as well give that one up right now.” She was wrong.

As in all wars, there is a foe. In the United States the foes tend to call themselves “Christians” and root their obsessive opposition in their particular interpretation of the Bible.

While these folks have had a series of wake up calls from the landmark 2012 elections where marriage equality won on the ballots in four states, to the earth shattering Supreme Court ruling on DOMA and California’s Proposition 8, the big anvil dropped in many of their states in these last few weeks. The threat of same sex marriage was no longer looming as possible where they lived, it was now here, and here to stay.

Many have started to react. After a story about LGBT couples marrying, Idaho reporter Dani Hawkins bizarrely states that there are “two sides to this story” as if an anti-gay couple who has a Bible on their coffee table is personally affected by the weddings of others they don’t even know. Hawkins presents Justin and Melanie Sease. Their “side” is to paint anti-gay statements on their car and to drive it around town in an attempt to humiliate gay people. Justin explains that his worry has a biblical origin. “The Bible says that when homosexuality is publicly accepted, basically it spreads like a cancer.” In actuality, the Bible does not say anything about the public accepting homosexuality, nor does it say anything about a homosexuality spread, and it never mentions cancer.

This is typical of the public conversations coming from the vocal “Christians”. Misinformation, falsehoods and demonization have moved front and center displacing anything that even remotely resembles logic or reasonable discussion. It has reached such a fevered pitch that it led The Pink Panthers Movement blogger Ken Jansen to plead with Christians at large, “Take a stand.  Raise your voice, shout out to the world that not all people of faith are like the hate mongers that we keep hearing from.  Prove to me that you believe in a religion of love.  Give me at least a bit of hope that there is some love left in the world.”

Christian pastor and writer John Pavlovitz speaks about LGBT people he has heard from after he declared that should his children turn out to be gay, that he would unconditionally support them. “What I was not prepared for in any way, were the literally hundreds and hundreds of people who have reached out to me personally, to thank me for bringing some healing and hope to their families. Parents, children, siblings, and adults have confided in me (some for the first time anywhere), telling of the pain, and bullying, and shunning they’re received from churches, pastors, and church members; from professed followers of Jesus.

Scores of people from all over the world have shared with me their devastating stories of exclusion and isolation, of unanswered prayers to change, of destructive conversion therapies, of repeated suicide attempts, and of being actively and passively driven from faith, by people of faith.”

I therefore submit the following six point guide for those people who have woken up in the past few weeks to find out that marriage equality has moved into the neighborhood.

Dear “Traditional Marriage” Proponent:

It is painful for me to witness the distress you seem to be experiencing over marriage equality coming to your state. I realize that you have fought against it and feared it. I know you think it will somehow damage your world.

Through it all, you have professed a faith in God. Rather than lash out with bad behavior against your fellow citizens, it might be more effective to rely on that faith now.

As a fellow Christian, I wanted to give you a suggested guide on how you may want to cope with what has taken place, and ways to accept it on your own biblically based terms:

  1. Do What Would Jesus Would Do: Jesus believed in the separation of church and state. “Render to Caesar that which is Caesar’s.” Jesus did not call for a rejection of same sex marriage; He merely described the terms of the current opposite sex marriages of the time. He did not hurl insults at people who society disparaged, He befriended them. He healed the lover of a Roman Centurion and praised the Roman’s level of faith. He gave us the golden rule, the good Samaritan and instructed us to “Love our neighbors as ourselves.” Emulate Christ.
  2. Meet Our Families and Understand Who We Are: There is a ridiculous amount of focus given to what our families aren’t. We aren’t couples who accidently got pregnant and needed marriage to encourage us to take care of the children we inadvertently created. That is true. We aren’t that. Almost without exception, we are families where a couple has planned how and when to have children. Many of our families are formed by adopting children who would live desperate lives without us, if they survived at all. My oldest son was born 6 weeks prematurely to a heroin addict, my youngest was found abandoned in a trailer at 10 months. Our kids are growing up to be safe, loved, well adjusted members of society. Jesus tells you to love the children of the world and the Ten Commandments tells you to support the honoring of parents. Please follow these Bible directives when looking at who we are.
  3. Focus on the Goodness in Marriage: Same sex marriage honors all the principles you hold dear in marriage itself. It is still about responsibility, the importance of family, love and commitment. The more same sex marriages there are, the more of those qualities there are in the world.
  4. Stop Valuing Discrimination and Seeking the Right to Do It: Discrimination is an evil. It is acting on an ignorance about others who you don’t know but pretend you do. It is bad enough to fall into a human tendency towards it, but even worse to actively fight for the right to behave that way. You pay the price for it. Discrimination comes at a huge personal cost. As you allow yourself that mindset, you concurrently develop the fear of being discriminated against yourself. We observe exactly this in all the paranoia being expressed by vitriolic anti-gay pundits sounding off today. Break free. “Thou shalt discriminate” is not biblical.
  5. Get Real With Your Relationship With the Bible: I have never met a non-lobster eating, pro-slavery, Sabbath-worker killing, woman silencing, flat-earther, poverty seeking Christian in my life. I am not saying that there isn’t one, just that I have not had the displeasure of meeting such and individual. I therefore, have never met someone who TRULY and literally believes in what every word of the translated Bible actually says. Every single Christian on the planet picks and chooses passages they find relevant. Believing that same sex marriage is wrong due to passages with potential interpretations depicting the rape of angels, and orgies in Roman temples is passé and completely irrelevant to committed relationships by two informed consenting adults. It is time to get real about with which principles you scan the Bible. Many have found that the Bible is not a literal rule book, but a profound book that traces the evolvement of spirituality and knowledge of higher consciousness. It is time to join them.
  6. Love: John, the right hand disciple of Jesus, defined God in direct terms in the Bible. He stated simply, “God is Love.” One’s relationship to the principle of Love is probably the most universally unifying and highly spiritual states achievable. Love cannot be proven, seen or even described, yet we all seem to have some sense of what it is, and hold it in esteem. It can be the common ground for the atheist, the religious and everyone in between. It is the single most gratifying aspect of both being human, and seeing oneself as a child of God. It is time to live it. It is time to give it generously, and experience the miracle that the more you give it away, the more you have, defying all other laws of limitation and depletion.

The Bible starts with a story about the tree of life, and Jesus concludes it with a directive on how to know who is truly representing cosmic truth. His litmus test is “By their fruits ye shall know them.”

I know “the fruits” of my life, and who I am every night at 8:30 PM. That is the time that I hold two young boys in my arms, and kiss them good night, and let them know how very much I love them. As I turn out the light, I breathe in my purpose and my path. It is time to look at what fruit your anti-gay behavior is producing. If it is shame and hurt, something is rotting badly.

My path with my family and our journey is not something that should cause you harm. My hope is that you stop fearing that it will, that you lay down your stones and pitch forks, and join us for a stroll. We would welcome you.


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About robw77

A single gay dad who cares. His story can be read here: http://www.imagaysingleparent.com/2013/02/02/rob/ and here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/31/rob-watson-gay-family_n_4689661.html
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56 Responses to A Survival Guide for Christians Who Have Been Fighting Against Marriage Equality

  1. Beth Duty says:

    I believe you are trying to play God, acting like you are perfect and never sin. Now I’ve got a serious question for you. … Why would God make people to be gay and then send them all to Hell because of the way He made us? ?? Being gay is not a choice, if you speak to anyone who is gay they will tell you the same. Or anyone with a bit of common sense would know that. In my case I know for a fact that I didn’t make a life changing decision by the young age of four! I had NO IDEA what being gay was or what sex was.I grew up in a Christian house hold, and still consider myself a Christian. By the time I found out what gay was, I already knew that I did not like boys and that I felt like a boy mentally and emotionally. So does that mean I’m going to Hell because of who I am?

    • here says:

      Beth I am so glad that you have responded. I am glad that I have been given an utterance to reply. I want to say first Beth that I will be praying for you, and I have prayed for you. I want to say that I know I must get on my knees every morning or night and ask the Lord for forgiveness. If any person says they have not sinned they shall make themselves a liar and the truth is not in them. Jesus loves us with an undying love  AMEN! Why would a holy and infinite God, perfect and pure who had not known sin, come down to our world and let the fallen creation whose heart is deceitful and evil spit in His face, beat Him, scourge Him, blaspheme His name and become the song of the drunkards? Why would he die the death that no one else was worthy to die when it was in His power to take Himself off the cross and destroy us all? You know why I believe and the greatest message ever in the history of the world is that “For God so loved the World.” It was because he wanted to live His life through us that we might become His habitation, His dwelling place. I got saved when I was 15 years old, but when I was in my late teens I fell away from God and began a life of partying which led to a drug addiction and eventually selling drugs. There were a few instances where I should have died from drugs and being held at gunpoint. But I knew that God had kept me alive for a reason and that was to proclaim the goodness of His name. I grew up without a father or a father figure, but my Heavenly father became my Father as He is a Father to the fatherless. He helped me figure out things that I never could on my own. He took away my feelings of fear, inadequacy, confusion, and hurt and restored me. I thank Him and know that every victory I will ever have or had was because of His grace. I know you have heard of Adam and Eve and there story in The Garden of Eden in the age of innocence and how they ate of the tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil. After that man was imputed or given this curse of the sin nature because they had disobeyed God’s only command at that time. What a mistake and because of that we as humans are born with a desire to sin, we may sin different ways or to different degrees, but the desire to sin none the less. The only way that man may have a desire to stop sinning altogether and have any long lasting victory over sin is to be BORN AGAIN. One must be born again to inherit the kingdom of God and that leads to repentance and a desire to stop sinning is because of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. I don’t want to say that you weren’t born with a desire to be attracted to women. I am a man who was born with a natural desire for women. This was an uncontrollable lust at one point for me I could not overcome it. It was only when I prayed to God and asked for His help that this lust could be taken from me. I will not lie that it tries to come back in at times, but my sin is meant to draw me to Him. We are born with a natural desire to sin only Jesus can take that from us. We must remember that Jesus didn’t just die for people to go to heaven or to be forgiven, but he also wanted to help us in this life as well that He may live through us. Beth I hope that I have not been insensitive to you in any manner in this regard. I know that some Christians have not handled the situation of same sex with grace or love. This is not what true Christianity is about. But as a Christian I must use scripture to reprove myself and reprove the sins of others that we may help them that they may be restored. As I know that some gay people have been offended by Christians and there sense of unrighteous judgement, this is not the case with all Christians. If I had the cure for HIV and I found it and cured myself, but I wouldn’t share it with anyone else how cruel would that be? Beth I want you to know the Lord loves you as you may know and that I love you. I hope that you feel compelled to share. I don’t have all the answers and I may be a fool, but if Christ is glorified in it then I hope all the more. If you hate me, but turn to Christ then may he be glorified. If I may die that you may be restored and Christ be glorified. I say AMEN!!!!

      • Ben in oakland says:

        And you know what I say? total bullshit. so you made a lot of bad choices, and you had a crappy life, and that was all because you sinned? And now you found god? Or was it simply because you grew up without a father who loved you and offered you parental guidance, and so you made a lot of bad choices until you learned not to make them. And you found god.

        but that isn’t us. It is only you in your spiritual arrogance that presumes to “know” otherwise.

  2. helga says:

    First of all,the bible has been translated so often,that to take every word as a final fact, is indead ignorant. I catered a private party on Cape Cod ,with 6 clergy of different denominations,some where bishops.They where discussing different parts of the bible and threw around 500 yrs. here and there,sort of ,how do you explain this in your church, or that.After that ,I could never go to a bible study or even go to church. The most learned Theologians are still uncertain about a lot of passages in their different bibles,it is almost comical to read the reasons of the truly ignorant!The churches always added something to further their own power,all through history!

  3. David in Chicago says:

    I honestly think that if people would spend more time tending to the beam in their own eye there would be little time for pointing out the spec in the eye of others. Those who make the most fuss seem to have the most to disguise. Judgment is mine sayeth the Lord. So, really, everyone else should just sit down now and get on with their own lives. If you feel the need to wave the Bible at people in order to judge them, then you are already outside of the will of God and his plan. Love others, mind your own business and leave the rest to God. It’s a simple formula.

  4. Here says:

    I am a Christian and I believe in the Word of God. I love people and I love God, but I know that to properly understand all scripture one must be born again. That means you are a new creation in Jesus Christ. As a Christian I cannot support Gay marriage. The reason a born again Christian should use scripture to show what God says about it is out of love to show God’s judgement towards it. If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. (‭Leviticus‬ ‭20‬:‭13‬ KJV) Even as Sodom and Gomorrha, and the cities about them in like manner, giving themselves over to fornication, and going after strange flesh, are set forth for an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire. (‭Jude‬ ‭1‬:‭7‬ KJV)And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? (‭Matthew‬ ‭19‬:‭4-5‬ KJV)For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; (‭Romans‬ ‭1‬:‭26-28‬ KJV). The bible is very clear about the issue of homosexuality and never mentions the same sex in marriage. We must realize that Jesus didn’t just die for forgiveness or to go to Heaven. Forgiveness is not salvation. What would be saved from hell? What about this life. Jesus lived the perfect life and that was the only reason he was qualified to die the death that he died, but the death that he died qualified us to live the life that he lived, Christianity was meant to be victorious. Paul said shall we use the grace of God to continue in sin, no, God forbid. He wanted to live his life through His followers. He said for one to inherit the kingdom of God one must be born again, you are still capable of sinning, but you have a desire to stop sinning. Asking God to change you’re heart from these sins. This is the gospel of Jesus Christ, the greatest message in the world and the only message that brings eternal life. He is able to forgive us of all sins, but we must repent and have the fear of God in our heart.

    • …Have you actually read the article before you commented? Especially the 5th rule.
      Quoting the bible isn’t enough to defend your argument. You just literally wrote “a born again Christian should use scripture to show what God says about it is out of love to show God’s judgement towards it” but honestly – DO YOU? Use the scripture?

      Do you eat bacon or pork? Do you eat shrimp? Do you think it’s okay for people to get a religious tattoo? Have you ever worked on the sabbath? Have you ever killed someone as punishment for working on the sabbath? Do you think it’s acceptable for a man to sell his own daughter? Do you support slavery?
      You write that people are capable of sinning, but they must repent and have a desire to stop sinning. So tell me, do you have a strong desire to stop shaving, to never EVER touch a football again in your life. Do you strongly wish to never ever wear any piece of clothing that is made from more than one fabric? Those are ALL sins in the Bible.

      You can’t argue that people should pay attention to every single line that was written in the Bible if you yourself can’t and won’t follow every single line. You can’t pick the parts you like and ignore others. You can’t say some parts are ‘irrelevant’ or outdated and tell us other parts are more important. That’s not your decision to make, you didn’t write the book. If you aren’t able or willing to follow the book to the letter, maybe you should focus on the main, most important messages instead. Which is love. Love your neighbour, like yourself. And that includes LGBT neighbours.

    • Ben in oakland says:

      I see. So you love us so much that you think we should be put to death? You said it, your god who is love said it. Not me.

      Do you people EVER, EVER think even a little bit about what you say? Because if this is how you think of love, then I would much prefer your hate. At least there, you won’t be committing the sin of lying.

      You, sir or madam, are a very, very sick individual, a postulating lesion on the heart of humanity, no better than the ISIS militants whom I’m sure you would emulate if only civilization didn’t get in your way.

      and I say that with all the love I have in my heart for fascist authoritarians who wish me to be executed.

  5. k kett says:

    I keep reading how God is the final judge, then why are the “christians” being so judgemental?

    • Ben in oakland says:

      Well, the answer to that is obvious. They think they are God.

      They have a little problem with over-identification with the omnipotent, omniscient creator of the universe, noting that whatever their opinions are, God certainly shares them.

    • That is all that really needs to be said. God is the final Judge. HE is the ONLY Judge. Christians are supposed to follow His laws, NOT make them up as they go along. Love your neighbors and leave the judgements to HIM.

  6. Jackie Saulmon Ramirez says:

    This is easy for me… WWJD? Jesus would love people and advise others to do the same.

  7. CJ McCrea says:

    Thanks, Rob, as always. These poor misguided folks, the Seases, are poor indeed. This is spiritual poverty at its worst. Granted, so many of us, myself included, have been conditioned by the Church (therefore society) for so long that homosexuality = evil that it’s a real effort to break free from such mental captivity. Thus, more educated and socially exposed people escape this ‘spell’, and those less educated and isolated seldom do, the Seases, I would guess, fall under the latter category. But to have an adult tantrum and make their SUV a moving billboard of unfettered hatred and lies is just inexcusable and reveals a depth of (spiritual) immaturity I can’t fathom. Please pray for these people. They need help. May LGBT Christians and people of faith respond with love, as Christ commanded (Matt 5:44), and the Holy Spirit reveal the sinful error of their theology and bigotry.

  8. This is unfortunately misleading. Especially #5. The New Testament clearly calls out homosexuality (along with a host of other sins). We will all have to answer to God on the day of Pentecost for our inequities, but I wish people wouldn’t act as if the Bible supports gay marriage because it does not.

    • robw77 says:

      You clearly did not read the article closely enough, especially #5.

      • Nope. I read it. That’s why I made that comment. Thank you

        • teri says:

          But some of us don’t care what the bible says since we aren’t Christians

          • True. And for those people there really isn’t anything to discuss (because we’ll never agree anyway).

            But the title of this post was about being a “Christian” so hopefully the author does read the Bible.

        • robw77 says:

          Then you did not understand it.

        • “I have never met a non-lobster eating, pro-slavery, Sabbath-worker killing, woman silencing, flat-earther, poverty seeking Christian in my life”

          The writer is literally referencing a number of sins in the bible. And those are just a few simple examples. Eating pork is forbidden, wearing clothes made of more than one fabric, shaving yourself, touching a football with your bare hands.
          The point of it ISN’T that the Bible supports gay marriage. It clearly doesn’t. The point is that Christians choose to ignore a lot of Bible content. You can’t just pick and chose the parts you like or the parts you don’t like, that’s not how it works.

    • teri says:

      Where exactly? Chapter & verse? Besides, as Rob wrote, I’ve yet to meet a Christian that abides by every word written in the bible.

      • Read: 1 Timothy 1:8-11 & I Corinthians 6:9-10

        It’s not about abiding by every word in the Bible. God knows that’s not possible. And don’t get me wrong, there are a whole lot of other sins out there. It’s about acknowledging your wrongdoings (per the Bible, not our opinions) and having true repentance.

        I’m not perfect, of course, but I also don’t go around saying that my sin is okay because I know that it’s not and I also do my best not to repeat that behavior.

        Christians are supposed to STRIVE to live according to the World of God not making exceptions when we feel like it. (Also, we don’t follow the Old Testament to the letter because Jesus came & was crucified so that we are no longer under the “old laws”)

    • ktah says:

      You must have overlooked the “orgies in roman temples” part because that’s the context within which many biblical scholars believe the new testament reference to homosexuality is based. Jesus also pointed out at Matthew 19:12 that some men won’t marry women for different reasons and for some of those men it’s because they are “born that way from their mother’s womb”. Jesus didn’t condemn those men. He actually said marriage between a man and woman is not for everyone and “those who can accept this should accept it”.

      • No, He wasn’t referencing homosexuality in that verse (talking about they were born that way). He was referring people who don’t/can’t have sex – not homosexuality.

        And also the quote you made about ‘marriage between a man and a woman is not for everyone’ was not ALL that was said in that chapter. No where did God or Paul, or anyone else say that it was okay for 2 of the same to marry; Paul mentions that it’s better to stay SINGLE and not marry at all. (1 Corinthians 7)

        All references and examples of marriage (even adultery like with David & Bathsheba) were between a man & a woman, not a man & a man. If we are to live according to the words & examples that are set forth in the Bible the best we can then that is the example that I believe we should follow.

        No one has yet to send me any Scripture where it states that it is OKAY for 2 men/2 women to marry.

    • Actually, no it does not. If you are referring to the passage in Romans, Paul is condemning idolatry of false idols (of which same sex rituals were a part). He is not condemning same sex acts directly/specifically. And the Matthew passage where Jesus says “he made them male and female” is not a statement of what god intended marriage to be. The fact that there were ordained polygamous relationships at the time speaks to that. No, what Jesus was doing was condemning Jewish men for their divorce practices. So you see, it’s all about cultural context. Just because you interpret them and want them to be about homosexuality doesn’t mean they are.

      • No, I’m referencing 1 Corinthians 6:9.

        Ordained polygamy doesn’t negate that God intended marriage to be between man & woman. You actually proved my point – MAN & WOMAN. The number of wives may differ due to cultural context but it still stands as a union between man & woman only.

        As a Christian, I am supposed to follow the words & examples set forth in the Scriptures. All marriages (even the adulterous relationships like David & Bathsheba) in the Bible are between a male & a female. There are no examples, parables, etc of a same-sex couple in the Bible whether it be in the Old or New Testament.

        • robw77 says:

          Chocolate Vent- you are re-writing the Bible to your own agenda. Women in biblical times were not full citizens but needed to be owned– so what today is a marriage between two equals, would not be what they considered marriage at the time. What we consider marriage WAS demonstrated in same gender relationships of the Roman Centurion and by Jesus/John themselves. As far as living by even the New Testament– in order for you to truly be striving to live by it, you would have to be pro-slavery and against women speaking their opinions to men. I hope that you do not strive to support either of those things.

    • Ben in Oakland says:

      When you spend the same amount of energy on people like the sease’s– or pat robertson, kevin swanson, tomy perkins, brian brown, bryan fissure, and a host of others– who ARE CLEARLY REVILING LIKE CRAZY, in contrary to paul’s message on the subject in the very same passage that allegedly condemns gay people, do let us know.

      Until then, you’re just another gong or clanging cymbal, trying to justify your prejudices with the bible…

      and no better than they are.

      • Please get your facts straight – Quoting the Bible does not make one prejudice.

        Just because you don’t agree with something doesn’t make it wrong. But hey, I didn’t write the Bible, so if you don’t agree with what’s in it, that’s your problem, not mine.

        • Ben in Oakland says:

          Quoting the bible does not make one prejudiced. absolutely.

          Using the bible as your weapon of choice against people you don’t approve of, using it ot justify the harm you are willing to wreak on their lives, all the while ignoring all of the other things that the exact same passage condemns, certainly does.

          my comment stands.

          • Understood. And there are a lot of things I don’t condone this passage mentions – fornication, greed, etc. I certainly am not perfect, but I also don’t try to act as if my sin is okay. And I think that’s the difference – it’s like me lying in bed having sex with a man & saying it’s okay when it’s clearly not.

            There are a lot of things I don’t condone & I would never “bash” anyone because of their lifestyle, it just bothers me when people try to justify their sin even when Scripture denouncing that sin is quoted to them.

            At the end of the day, we all will have to answer to God. And I hope EVERYONE who believes in God is striving to live a lifestyle that is pleasing to Him.

            Thank you


    • riplar65 says:

      actually love if you had read your Bible as you claim you would understand that believer’s no longer answer for our “inequities” on the day of Pentecost as you claim. The true Believer had their “sins” covered and paid for with the blood of Christ. We will simply be judged by our works. The author was quite correct with his assertion made in #5…Christ NEVER once made any reference to SSM in ANY of his teachings. The reference in the New Testament was actually made by Paul and it was a discussion on the socio-critical context of the Laodicean church . So before you let uneducated, bible not read, ignorant and hate spewing christian stupidity fall out of your mouth at least have the decency to read your material before you engage; unfortunately for you and your narrow mindedness their are GREAT Christians out there who have actually read their Bibles and understand the true message of Christ’s Love.

    • Scott says:

      No, the New Testament does not “clearly call out homosexuality” That would be a near impossibility. Namely because “homosexual” is a fairly modern word. No such word existed in ancient Greek or Hebrew. What you are “clearly” reading is a fairly modern interpretation of a kind of made up word…. But thank you for trying!

  9. absolutely love #5. great post as usual.

  10. georgiakevin says:

    Horti this is such an awesome post! Thank you for reblogging it. Shoot I have not read or seen a post that you have done or shared that hasn’t been worth seeing/reading!

  11. georgiakevin says:

    This is an outstanding well thought out well written post! So well done! Thank you for writing such a wonderful post!

  12. Great post! I had a prompt to write and the word is “marriage”|…reading your post has inspired me to change my original story to something that is more meaningful.

  13. Jueseppi B. says:

    Reblogged this on MrMilitantNegro™.

  14. Dr. Rex says:

    Reblogged this on It Is What It Is and commented:
    Here’s a very useful guide!! Stop & take a look ….

  15. Monika Hug says:

    People like this make Amerika Look backwards , it’s a shame

  16. jerbearinsantafe says:

    Reblogged this on JerBear's Queer World News, Views & More From The City Different – Santa Fe, NM and commented:
    For those of you who are Christian…

  17. Ffsketchup says:

    The laws in the Old Testament were set forth by god as the rules the Hebrews needed to follow in order to be righteous, to atone for the sin of Adam and Eve and to be able to get into Heaven. That is also why they were required to make sacrifices, because it was part of the appeasement for Original Sin.
    According to Christian theology, when Jesus came from Heaven, it was for the express purpose of sacrificing himself on the cross so that our sins may be forgiven. His sacrifice was to be the ultimate act that would free us from the former laws and regulations and allow us to enter Heaven by acting in his image. That is why he said “it is finished” when he died on the cross. That is why Christians don’t have to circumcise their sons (god’s covenant with Jacob), that is why they don’t have to perform animal sacrifice, or grow out their forelocks, or follow any of the other laws of Leviticus.
    When you quote Leviticus as god’s law against gays and say they are rules we must follow because they are what god or Jesus wants us to do, what you are really saying, as a Christian, is that Christ’s sacrifice on the cross was invalid. He died in vain because you believe we are still beholden to the old laws. That is what you, a self-professed good Christian, are saying to your god and his son, that their plan for your salvation wasn’t good enough for you.
    So maybe actually read the thing before you start quoting it, because the implications of your actions go a lot deeper than you think.

    1 John 3:15 – Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer: and ye know that no murderer hath eternal life abiding in him.


  18. Wonderfully put. I am LGBT…and Christian. I have had to spend so much time trying to reconcile that, and so will so many other people, younger and older alike. I ended up having to leave the south (where I am from) because I just couldn’t find a way to make it work. Thanks for writing.

    • I am also a Christian AND a lesbian. I know many people who are broken and hurt by their church’s families and friends. Here is how I wrap my head around it, and this is an irrefutable argument (IMHO) Jesus Christ, my Lord and savior who died on the cross so that I may have everlasting life never said ONE WORD against Homosexuality, not one. He even healed a roman soldiers male slave because of the love that he shared with him. The fact that Jesus, who was perfect, never mentioned it, not even in passing, speaks volumes to me. The apostles, who were all too human and thus make mistakes, did make some comments, but they also had their own agendas and were again, human and thus not perfect. So to me, businesses who claim that it is against their beliefs to make flower arrangements, sell dresses or bake a cake for LGBT weddings are not really doing it because it is against their religion, they are doing it because it makes them feel icky when they think about us in the bedroom. They probably don’t think about all the other couples that they service in the bedroom *and if they do, they need to seek professional help QUICKLY! – but they don’t like thinking about us in the bedroom -although I bet their husbands do, just saying… – Anyhow, the best we can do is not give up on God and Jesus because of the idiocy of others, and keep showing the love that Jesus showed us. I know it’s hard, but keep the faith and know in the end that Love (among two adults who consent) is NOT wrong, and was NEVER what was being preached about. Blessings to you! -Holly

  19. Cris says:

    Here in Canada we have had equal rights marriage in the entire country since July 20th 2005. Absolutely nothing has been threatened. The only thing different is more cake and better bridesmaid dresses!

  20. mykelb1 says:

    I wouldn’t join those people for a gum chewing contest. Their ignorance, their vicious harassment, their RELIGIOUS PRIVILEGE in state and national law is more than damning of their intent against the LGBT community.

  21. Teri says:

    Beautifully written, as always. I cannot understand why so many people put so much energy into fighting against equal rights for gay men and women yet appear to do so little for causes that really need help – child abuse, poverty, hunger. Sad.

    • Ben in Oakland says:

      because thopse causes don’t involve a feeling of superiority, a validation of prejudice, and actually require some sacrifice.

      not to mention, as I am increasingly convinced, condemning the alleged sins of others in order to feel better about your own.

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