by guest blogger Ken Jansen

Reading an announcement about Jodie Foster’s recent marriage to Alexandra Hedison, I was appalled by some of the comments after the article. “I guess she’s ashamed of who she is. That’s the impression you get when she tries to keep it secret. Now she’s enjoying the benefits other people fought for..” or “Maybe she’ll give a public speech about privacy again. She’s a complete nut.” and ” While she hid in the closet. She’s a wonderful actress [even though her recent choices have been ‘less-than’], but not a good role model for anyone.”

Are comments like these necessary? Jodie Foster has spent her life trying to keep her private life…well, private. Why do we, as a “community” see this as something a celebrity should be ashamed of? Some have decided to make their coming out public. People like Ricky Martin, Ellen Degeres and Adam Lambert, through athletes like ground-breakers Billie Jean King and Martina Navratilova to more recently Tom Daley, Jason Collins and others.

I commend all of them for their courage, but wonder why some people think that this is so vitally important. But, if stars like these decide that the public needs to know about their private lives, does that automatically set the bar for other celebs to follow? Do all people in the public eye have to follow their lead? Does someone’s sexuality matter that much? Would our lives have been impacted in any way had they chosen NOT to come out?

As Johnny Galecki so eloquently put it: “I haven’t really addressed those rumours because why defend yourself against something that isn’t offensive.” At the same time, why should he address rumours that are none of our business? I don’t understand the near obsession so many people have with celebrity’s sexuality. if they choose to come out, great. If they choose to keep it a secret, great. If, as Ms Foster did, they simply choose to keep their lives private, also great.

Now, having said that, I do understand that celebrities are often held as role models, and as a community we need more positive role models. Having celebrities publicly proclaiming their sexuality, especially younger celebrities, sends the message to our youth that it’s okay to be proud of yourself. If someone like Jodie Foster, or any other celebrity, decides not to have a huge rainbow-flag-waving, coming out press conference, who really cares? It is, after all, their life, not ours to decide. True, they chose a public job, but it’s not incumbent on them to explain every nuance of their private lives to us. They are as much entitled to privacy as anyone else. And if they do chose not to broadcast every part of their lives, we have no right to judge them.

All we should do, now, is wish Jodie and Alexandra the best, and let them move on with their private life

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